I know that I did before I got my bipolar 1 disorder under control. I can remember what a fool I made of myself on more than one occasion.
If you suffer from mania brought on by bipolar 1 you will understand that the symptoms are very difficult to control, and most of the time you don’t realize you are going into a manic episode.
If you are able, it is a good idea to make notes of how you felt leading up to your first episode of mania, then someone may be able to bring your list to your attention before it is too late when another mania is on the horizon. When mania takes hold, all you can do is see your doctor for a tweak of your medication or go to the hospital which nobody wants to do.
As you know, the symptoms of mania can be devastating. The euphoria is nice at first, and so is the spending, but soon comes the talking at a mile a minute, ideas coming into your head faster than you can keep up with them, and upsetting people wherever you go. And not everybody forgives us after a manic episode, do they? It is nothing to lose family and friends to bipolar 1 mania.
Personally, I used to have more dysphoric manias the older I got, and I think that is even worse to try to control. All the irritability that leads to anger, and in my case, long bouts of rage that lasted for weeks. You may be unfortunate like me, and have to put up with that.
What other illness has a total change of personality? Can you name one? It is awful to have diabetes and have to control your sugar intake, but at least when you are diabetic you are always the same person every day of the week. Not so with bipolar disorder, as you know.
And then 60% of people with bipolar 1 have psychosis on top of mania and have to put up with hallucinations and delusions. This usually ends with a hospital visit.
I would like to tell you that last month I published a book called Bipolar 1 Rescue Plan which was written for people like you and I. It is published on Amazon and I will leave the link below. I am sure you will find this book helpful in controlling your bipolar 1 symptoms If you do buy a copy please leave a review on Amazon.